Mutating Missionary
God does not send us into the dangerous and exacting life of faith because we are qualified; He chooses in order to qualify us for what he wants us to be or do." Eugene Peterson
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What would it look like if I had as much exuberance as Zaccchaeus? How would it feel to know that Jesus Christ would be so aware of how much I wanted to simply get a look at Him, He would invite Himself in to be with me. I had a major heart attack.
I have no damage to my heart. Doctors call it rare. I call it a miracle. I really want to know Him. I want him to come in and sup with me. And He blessed me with life on this earth to serve Him a bit longer. Because He IS the I AM, I am Robyn Rochelle Cox. today I simply thank Him for all He has done.
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Hello, Thanks for visiting, After I get all of the mutating missionary blogs from the past re-posted here, I will continue writing fresh ones. Enjoy the review... Robyn Rochelle Cox RR&BC, LLC©2016 Loving God in the Moment  For months I haven't posted regularly. I have not one iota of understanding why. I know that I am, as is said here in Germany "standing between two stools". One is the English language and the other the German language. One is the American culture the other is the German culture. One is living within coffee drinking distance of my children and the other an ocean and half-a-country away.
But even in my daily writing I have waned. It has been a bit disconcerting for me. In 24 hours I will be sitting at the Zürich airport awaiting my flight home. I visit for five days, travel for 2. Just looking at those numbers makes me tired. But, I am so thankful to the people and the loved ones that have helped me see my daughter graduate. It is so amazing to be able to do this. I cannot tell you. I had no plans - no thoughts - this would be a possibility. It comes after a long stint in language school. I have said this before, but I say it again. I can speak German. I really can. I am better and better at it. But I am not good enough yet. I have moved beyond the sweet little Mexican woman that I so empathize with. You know the one? I told you about her in my first few months here. I told you about sitting in my classroom in LISD and speaking with this sweet little old lady that came daily to clean my classroom. She would smile at me and she would, in very broken English, say something to me. I would respond in Spanish, and she would fly into her mother tongue thinking that I could understand what she said. She would speak with fervor and with power. But, then she would realize she had lost me and go back to this pained 'searching for every word and syllable’ conversation. It was gruesome. I am beyond that. I can carry on conversations with many mistakes, but carry them on. The people that I am speaking with can understand what I am saying and we have laughed and cried and been friends. But, I am still not where I need to be. I must be pretty good to teach a bible study. So, I continue in language school in April or May. I listened to one of my 'boys' preach on his blog in Spanish yesterday. He is a missionary in Guatemala. I have watched him grow up and am now privileged enough to watch him rear his family on the mission field. They have it pretty rough. But, he spoke with such fluidity - I was a bit envious. Learning a language in school is an advantage. Another young woman that I have watched grow up is living here as a newlywed. She is not as close to me in proximity as I would like. When she came I was in the midst of heavy duty ministry and headed to language school. So I haven't gotten to see her. She studied German in school as well. She writes it beautifully. I wish I knew as much of the German language Grammatik as she knows. But, she is dealing with homesickness, frustrations with the culture and basically, and huge questions as to 'why in heaven's name she ever wanted to come to this country' feeling. I CAN RELATE! I hope to see her in January. I have cousins and a nephew here. I haven't seen either. So... my intrigue of how and why I am here in a foreign land with no school preparations in my past - why I have not written so often of late - and why haven't I been able to connect with those that are here in Germany like I would have liked are all roaming around in my head. But right now I am itching to write. I'm itching to share something that happened in these last few weeks. So today will be a multiple post day. 'Feast or famine.' :-) mutating missioanary & ebenezer "Ich, Jesus, bin der helle Morgenstern" Offenbarung 22,16 "I Jesus am the Bright and Morning Star" Revelation 22:16 Hello, Thanks for visiting, After I get all of the mutating missionary blogs from the past re-posted here, I will continue writing fresh ones. Enjoy the review... Robyn Rochelle Cox RR&BC, LLC©2016 Loving God in the Moment  My bedroom holds many memories of family and friends. My red-prayer-chair sits in my bedroom, as does this card my mom gave me for my birthday one year. Every year around my birthday I remember the day she gave it to me. It was in the year 2000. I had met a man on a plane in October after coming home from a mission trip to Holland over the summer. This man would change my life. He took me down a road of expectation. I hadn't been down that road for many years. He was and is a famous jazz musician. But this one card holds memories of that experience because my mom was having to deal with the possibility that I might, just might begin a relationship with a man that she 'culturally' might have problems accepting, and yet knowing that as the wonderful believer she is ... well, she would just have to! If we loved each other. The card is in black and white and says, "What a delightful difference one single life makes!" The card had/has many levels of meaning. The possibility of the married kind of love for me was real. It might have happened - but 9-11 sent us on different paths. His pain in New York was great - my pain in Flower Mound was given to God. and He carries this one single life - continually!  mutating missionary
& ebenezer PS my favorite line in the above song: Teach me to pray, Teach me to love to obey, Teach me to pray. Hello, Thanks for visiting, After I get all of the mutating missionary blogs from the past re-posted here, I will continue writing fresh ones. Enjoy the review... Robyn Rochelle Cox RR&BC, LLC©2016 Loving God in the Moment  I love autumn, fall, herbst! I find it tantalizing. Such a hint of playfulness. The leaves dance in the wind and then fall to create a blanket on the floor of mother earth, they turn different colors overnight. The wind whips around corners and haunts my bedroom. The sun chooses which hours to shine and which hours to hide away behind the clouds. I love autumn, fall, herbst!and it is a season when all of my creative juices bubble! mutating missionary & ebenezer  Hello, Thanks for visiting, After I get all of the mutating missionary blogs from the past re-posted here, I will continue writing fresh ones. Enjoy the review... Robyn Rochelle Cox RR&BC, LLC©2016 Loving God in the Moment   Who grows a church? I'm involved with a group of wonderful people on the other side of my past world and we desire to build a church. This is our desire. You might ask why? Isn't Germany the home of Luther? of the great theological minds? of huge churches and wide and deep histories? Yes. It is. But... people here are considered out dated if they actually believe what the bible says about God. So... do you think that Satan would really be without concern for a church that has a really good biblical teacher, praise music that most hear only in concert halls, a few people (30-50) attending regularly and living life out with each other, hungry new believers, and hearts that are completely God's. Do you think that maybe he would hummmmm like.... not really want this to happen? I've been wondering how he might try to clip our wings. But... this I know! Nothing happens in the life of a believer that is not sifted through the loving hands of a loving and compassionate God. The spiritual attacks, the physical attacks, the poor choices, the unwise decision... somehow... somehow... God will triumph. Why? Because He said He would. Because it is not about us. He will not allow His name to continue to be sullied. He will not... He will not... And so when I don't understand something, when I am confused in this place, when I watch my loved ones hurt and hurt for them, when I discern choices for positive or negative in this body of believers, where do I run? When I have others come to me and ask why someone is doing something... and grow tired of saying, talk to that person... Where do I run? Where do I run? Into the arms of a sovereign God. He who allows us to suffer the consequences of our own actions, but will not allow Satan to destroy us. I wonder... does He ever get tired of my having to remind myself of these facts? He grows His church. I really need Him to hold me during the growing pains though. I really need Him to hold me. Because I know that the consequences don't last for just a week... they last a life time.  Hello, Thanks for visiting, After I get all of the mutating missionary blogs from the past re-posted here, I will continue writing fresh ones. Enjoy the review... Robyn Rochelle Cox RR&BC, LLC©2016 Loving God in the Moment     Names are very important to me. They stand for something. I have three children and much thought and prayer was given before I named each one. Names are very important. Today in my readings I came across Gideon. Gideon, you probably have heard about him. He was the guy that God called to get Israel back on track. He was chosen by God to get the Midianites out of control. He destroyed a temple of Baal (his father's) and gave an offering to the one True God. And God was pleased. But, the neighbors were not! They sought out the culprit that destroyed the temple and found out it was Gideon. They went after him and his dad 'protected (?)' him. The story goes like this: "They said to one another, "Who did this thing? And when they searched about and inquired, they said, "Gideon the son of Joash did this thing." Then the men of the city said to Joash. "Bring out your son, that he may die, for he has torn down the altar of Baal, and indeed, he has cut down the Asherah which was beside it." But Joash said to all who stood against him, "Will you contend for Baal, or will you deliver him?" Whoever will plead for him shall be put to death by the morning if he is a god, let him contend for himself, because someone has torn down his altar." Therefore on that day he named him Jerubbaal, that is to say "Let Baal contend against him." because he had torn down his alter." Judges 6:29-32 (read more about the way that God helped Gideon in Judges... but then later in chapter 7 it begins: "Then Jerubbaal (that is, Gideon) and all the people who were with him rose early and camped beside the spring of Harod; and the camp of Midian was on the north side of them by the hill of Moreh in the valley. The LORD said to GIDEON (emphasis mine), "The people who are with you are too many for Me to give Midian into their hands. for Israel would become boastful, saying, "My own power has delivered me." GREAT stories!!! But back to the point of this blog spot. Names. This morning, I found it interesting that people changed Gideon's name, but God still called him Gideon! There are times in the word where God has changed people's names. Sara, Saul, etc. etc. And He also tells us that He has given us a secret name that only He knows. This name He will give us when He sees us face to face and I believe our hearts will leap when He calls us by this name. But this is the only place that I have taken notice of people giving someone a name and God not going along with it. How often do we give people names? labels? How often do we give ourselves names? labels? What names does our God call us? Mine is rre: chosen daughter of the king! Not: woman who has left her own 'successful' career and life to become a 2 year old in a foreign land unable to converse over the smallest and most simple theological truths!!!!!!! ---- this is so often what I feel like. However, I can certainly get none of the glory for any fruit that is being harvested!!!!!!!! AND His Name is being glorified as fruit is being harvested!!! and I am so excited that He allows me to worship and adore Him. May I do it the rest of my life. mutating missionary & ebenezer  Hello, Thanks for visiting, After I get all of the mutating missionary blogs from the past re-posted here, I will continue writing fresh ones. Enjoy the review... Robyn Rochelle Cox RR&BC, LLC©2016 Loving God in the Moment  "The men of Judah attacked Jerusalem also and took it. They put the city to the sword and set it on fire. After that the men of Judah went down to fight against the Canaanites living in the hill country, the Negev and the western foothills. They advanced against Canaanites living in Hebron ...and defeated Sheshai, Ahiman, and Talmai. From there they advanced against the people living in Debir.... And Caleb said, 'I will give my daughter Acsah in marriage to the man that attacks and captures Kerith Sepher." Othniel son of Kenaz, Caleb's younger brother, took it. So Caleb gave his daughter Acsah to him in marriage. One day when she came to Othniel she urged him to ask her father for a field. When she got off her donkey, Caleb asked her, "What can I do for you?" She replied, "Do me a special favor. Since you have given me land in the Negev, give me also springs of water." Then Caleb gave her the upper and lower springs. Judges 1:8-15 I am really amazed sometimes at how much I don't know the word of God. I don't know how many times I have read this passage. I don't know how many times I have skimmed this passage. But, I have never been captured by these verses before. Was Acsah greedy? Spoiled? Worried? As I read the verses I see much war, much discomfort, much going on. I know for me seeing those I love go off and not come back from a war situation is disconcerting. I remember Viet Nam, The Gulf War, and now what is going on in the middle east... But, this woman was bound to a warrior. He had conquered and she was his reward. I don't see her as spoiled. She did what her father required. (I don't see anywhere that anyone asked her who she wanted to marry) She was obedient to her father and married the guy. But then she asks her husband to ask for land. He does and Caleb gives it. I wonder was she aware of the brevity of life and wondering how to make sure that she was taken care of. She asks her father and he gives her what she asks. I don't think this was wrong or selfish. I think that she was thinking of her needs and making sure she and any descendants she had would be taken care of. Remember he husband was a warrior... I am not going into all of the ins and outs of this scripture... Just pondering it. I might come back and say none of this was correct, she was a jerkett and she was selfish as is evidenced later in this verse and that verse... But, right now I am pondering that fact that she was provided for. Not only that she was provided for but she realized that she needed springs - springs of running water. When she got off her donkey, I can just imagine Caleb seeing a concern in her face. Because he asks her, "What can I do for you?' Have you ever heard God ask that? I have. I am asking God to give me springs of water. He has given me SO much. I am thankful. But there is a disturbance within me. I want Him even more. I am asking Him to pour Himself over me with fresh springs of living water and for me to swim in the love that I know He has for me. And I am asking for springs of water from my heavenly Father who has already given me land. I am asking because He is asking me, "What can I do for you?" I ask for more of Him. mutating missionary & ebenezer    Hello, Thanks for visiting, After I get all of the mutating missionary blogs from the past re-posted here, I will continue writing fresh ones. Enjoy the review... Robyn Rochelle Cox RR&BC, LLC©2016 Loving God in the Moment  that wonderful quote: Bloom where you are planted!  Hello, Thanks for visiting, After I get all of the mutating missionary blogs from the past re-posted here, I will continue writing fresh ones. Enjoy the review... Robyn Rochelle Cox RR&BC, LLC©2016 Loving God in the Moment   It has been a while since I last posted. I have now returned from Czech Republic, looking forward to a short visit with company from the USA, work has been exhilarating and a bit taxing and I've been pondering in the wee hours L-I-F-E when L-I-F-E hasn't been moving at an ICE Zug's speed! (the fast train in Europe)... When I get several notices from friends and family that they are worried about me because of this long absence, and they are ready for some new thoughts and pictures... I must admit it causes me to wonder - what shall I write about? The work that is going on here? The new avenues God is bringing me down? The old cracked roads He is mending? The smiles, the tears, the laughter, the joy? (which as we all know the latter may or may not consist of happiness...) I honestly don't know. There are so many facets in my life right now. So much that is happening. And yet most of it is too personal and too intimate to share on an internet site. Too many people living life in a new way and seeing God's hand move in their hearts and their lives. And yet, some say, they still would like to hear what is happening in my heart, in my life, in my world. And there I stop. My world. It has so expanded and so exploded in the last few years. And yet, has it changed? I still wake each morning glad for another day, interested in what it holds in store, intrigued at the different nuances and the fun new angles He brings. Relationships are, as always, difficult. They mean that one must remove themselves of their pre-suppositions and receive what is offered. I learned long ago not to judge a book by it's cover (so trite and yet so true). Some very 'normal' people are not normal and some very 'abnormal' people are as right as rain. I've never enjoyed the labels the world attaches to almost any and every person. And so you have it... another random ranting from your mutating missionary (giggles, laughs, sighs, a few tears, and a great big hug to the world that God has given me to love!) mutating missionary & ebenezer Hello, Thanks for visiting, After I get all of the mutating missionary blogs from the past re-posted here, I will continue writing fresh ones. Enjoy the review... Robyn Rochelle Cox RR&BC, LLC©2016 Loving God in the Moment Sharing my world with you.        ATTENTION: June and July are missing -- Does anyone know where they went? I become more and more aware of the scriptures that deal with the brevity of life as I sometimes live too fast on this world. And yet, the scriptures that deal with life are the ones that I have been meditating on. May was a time of remembrances for me. I enjoyed a 'conversation' of sorts on this blog spot with my sister and a cousin of ours. We rambled down memory lane and I completely swam in the reality that one cannot get away from one's gene pool. One comment on the blog spot made the assumption that we were English teachers - and if we were that would make these comments sensible. Alas, no ... we are none of us English Teachers. My sister did major in English during her second stent at University, and I am a Reading/Writing specialist and a Creative Workshop Writer Trainer - but English Teacher - No!!!!! We are not. One might ask, "Why not?" The answer is simple: She because writing is her love, and I because creativity is mine ;-) No, we are simply Eas***m girls. We enjoy words. We enjoy the play, the toil, and even the surprises that words ignite. However, my Aha! moment came upon my cousin's entry. We have rarely seen each other in our grown-up years. And yet here on the cyber-page her words were warm and melodic. They echoed my sister's and mine. It caused me to ponder for a long time over gene-pools! That, with the words written on the last post, has set me down a new road, a road to remember and take hold of the truths of this Proverb: (most of you will stop reading now... because what I write is the entire chapter of Proverbs 3 - das ist schade = that is a pity = that is too bad. My prayer is that you read and contemplate where God is speaking to you. I know I have. Proverbs 3 My son, do not forget my teachings, but keep my commands in your heart, for they will prolong your life many years and bring you prosperity. Let love and faithfulness never leave you; bind them around your neck, write them on the tablet of your heart. Then you will win favor and a good name in the sight of God and man. Trust in the LORD with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge Him and He will make your paths straight. Do not be wise in your own eyes; fear the LORD and shun evil. This will bring health to your body and nourishment to your bones. Honor the LORD with your wealth and with the first fruits of all your crops; then your barns will be overflowing and your vats will brim over with new wine. My son do not despise the LORD's discipline, and do not resent His rebuke, because the LORD disciplines those He loves as a father, the son he delights in. Blessed is the man who finds wisdom, who gains understanding, for she is more profitable than silver and yields better returns than gold. She is more precious than rubies; nothing you desire can compare with her. Long life is in her right hand; in her left are riches and honor. Her ways are pleasant ways and all her paths are peace. She is a tree of life to those who embrace her; those who lay hold of her will be blessed. By wisdom the LORD laid the earth's foundations, by understanding he sat the heavens in place; by His knowledge the deeps were divided, and the clouds let drop the dew. My son, preserve sound judgment and discernment, do not let them out of your sight; they will be life to you, an ornament to grace your neck. Then you will go on your way in safety; your foot will not stumble; when you lie down you will not be afraid; when you lie down your sleep will be sweet. Have no fear of sudden disaster or of the ruin that overtakes the wicked, for the LORD will be your confidence and will keep your foot from being snared. Do not withhold good from those who deserve it, when it is in your power to act. Do not say to your neighbor, "Come back later, I will give it to you tomorrow" when you have it with you. Do not plot harm to your neighbor, who lives trustfully near you. Do not accuse a man for no reason, when he has done you no harm. Do not envy a violent many or chose any of his ways, for the LORD detests a perverse man but takes the upright into his confidence. The LORD's curse is on the house of the wicked, but He blesses the home of the righteous. He mocks proud mockers, but gives grace to the humble. The wise inherit honor, but fools he holds up to shame. Now, I stop today and thank my LORD. I thank Him for my gene pool, for my life, for my love, for my days, for my Ebenezer. I thank HIM and beg Him to create in me the person that can read this chapter and sleep well.mutating, mutating, mutating missionary By the way did you hear the angels sing about a week ago? One of the women I am mentoring made a life surrendering commitment to our LORD! We went to a small chapel, prayed together, and she hasn't stopped smiling since. mutating |
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